Working It Out:
Solving Conflicts In The Workplace

Contributed by Jennifer Goldman

In the workplace, people’s ideas and opinions sometimes clash. This isn’t necessarily a sign that they are disagreeable, stubborn, or looking to create conflict. Conflict is a natural part of the business world. In fact, strong opinions may be a testament to just how important “doing the job right” is to a given employee. Regardless, that employee will need to learn some flexibility and compromise in order to resolve his or her conflicts with others in a way where everybody wins. Satisfaction on everyone’s part leads to a unified team, and a solid team effort makes everyone’s job easier. A conflict is a call to action, often resulting in positive change. A disagreement can serve as the catalyst for a creative problem solving session, during which everyone feels his or her opinion is valued, thereby boosting employee morale.

There are several common underlying causes of difference in the workplace. Among the most prevalent are conflicts of interest resulting from individual employees focusing on their own personal agenda, as opposed to the collective good. Disagreements also frequently arise in a competitive environment where people struggle to prove they’re right or that they’re more knowledgeable than their peers. Some conflicts are the result of one person shirking his or her responsibilities, and another having to pick up the slack. Or, coworkers may start a tug-a-war over the distribution of scarce supplies. Other times, their differences stem from a lack of clear understanding regarding their places in the chain of command, or the chain of production, for that matter. Sometimes conflicts come up due to misunderstanding. These problems are the result of a lack of communication. Still other disagreements are rooted in employee’s clashing values, or simply in their vastly different personalities, which may make it difficult for them to create a comfortable dynamic. Other employees may be too much alike!

Because people have different styles of expressing themselves, and conflicts will inevitably result at times, it’s important that all employees get on board when it comes to the fair and correct method of resolving their disputes.

Problems should be addressed as soon as they arise, not left to fester. Leaving conflicts unresolved, leads to resentment, distraction, passive aggressive behavior, and ultimately an irrational “blowup” they may cause someone to lose his or her job. Talk to the person you’re having a conflict with and see if you can nip it in the bud before it gets too bad. Your coworker may want to resolve the dispute just as much as you do.

Talk to the person your clashing with, face-to-face, and describe what you believe to be the problem. This doesn’t mean hurling accusations. Just state your point of view, describing the conflict and illustrating what you think may be the cause. Approach this with the attitude that the conflict is the enemy to be defeated, not the other person. This is something the two of you can take on and solve together. Ask the person to explain (not defend) his or her side of the argument, with the goal of establishing a better understanding of his or her views. Look for commonalities in your motives, in order to put yourself in the other person’s shoes. You may discover that your actions were inadvertently creating obstacles for your coworker, when all the while you were just thinking of that person as difficult or stubborn.

Understanding the others person’s views doesn’t necessarily mean that you must agree with them. Remember, the purpose of having this conversation, is to come to a mutual beneficial solution, not to get your way or to win or lose the argument.

When working to resolve a conflict, be prepared to compromise. There may not be a perfect solution that gives you both exactly what you want. But if you can come to some agreement that caters to both parties needs, you’ll both be very likely to get a lot more of what you want. And what ever you lose will be worth the trade off, since you’ll no longer have to deal with the stressful obstacle of the ongoing disagreement. On the other hand, don’t agree to terms that you’re not comfortable with, just to end the argument. If you’re overly accommodating you’ll wind up feeling resentful, and you’ll have no one to blame but yourself. Plus the conflict will remain unresolved!

Avoid getting personal when you discuss a conflict. Talk about the issues not the emotions that surround them. Never, ever attack a person’s character. Just discuss the isolated incidents that are causing a problem, i.e., impeding your ability to perform your job functions.

With collaborative problem solving that incorporates both of your unique viewpoints, you can collectively come up with a solution that pleases you both. You might even be impressed by what you two ”rivals” can accomplish once you put your heads together.

About the Author:
Jennifer Goldman is a freelance writer, editor, and proofreader living in Denver, Colorado.

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